Struggle with God

I will be the first to admit that I struggled with God. I love God greatly but I do not understand His ways. There are many people that want to make me legalistic but they forgot about God's grace.

I can relate to Jacob. He had his own will and didn't always do what God wanted for him.
Life has an way to humble an person. A friend that the family lived died. I just went to an funeral of someone that was murdered. Life doesn't always make sense to me.

God appeared to Jacob in Genesis 35:9-10. Genesis 35:9-10 says, "After Jacob returned from Paddan Aram, God appeared to him again and blessed him. God said to him, Your name is Jacob, but you will no longer be called Jacob; your name will be Israel. So he named him Israel."

If you are wondering where Paddan Aram is at, it is in the area of Northwest Mesopotamia. This area was most likely the Eastern part of modern-day Syria and Iraq.  God appears to us in different times of our lives. God appeared to me in special ways.

I had trials that seem that it will never end then it does. God did great spiritual surgery upon my heart.
God did the same to Jacob. Jacob means 'he grasps the heels.' It is an idiom for people that are not honest.

I always find it interesting to think that people can live by following the Old Testament law after following Jesus. Jesus came to fulfill the Old Testament law so when He died on the cross and arose from the dead. That the curse of the law would be no more. We are like Jacob. We can't live the law and be right before God, that includes Christians. Galatians 3:10 says, "For who rely on the works of the law are under a curse, as it is written: 'Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the book of the law." If you want to further study, you can study Deuteronomy 27:26.
I am sad to say that there a few movement that suppose to Christians that follow the Old Testament like Old Testament Jews should read Deuteronomy 27:26.

Even the best Christian will sin everyday. James 2:10 says, "For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles are one point is guilty of breaking it all." There are over 600 Old Testament laws. If you are an Sabbath Christians that believe in following the 600 laws, you can't follow over 600 of them.
You break these laws everyday.

If you a non-believer, you can't be made right by following the law. We need Jesus to be made right.
That is why Jesus died on the cross and arose from the dead. May we all from the legalist Christian to the non-believer realize Matthew 5:17-20. Only Jesus is sinless.

Genesis 35:10 says, "But you will no longer be called Jacob but your name be called Israel.' So he named him Israel." Many Christians say the Jews are more spiritual than they are because they keep the law. Israel means 'he struggles with God.'

We all struggle with God, this includes myself but we need more grace and not more legalism.
May we learn this.
May we embrace Hebrews 4:16.

Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_B9hh8omaRg

Sorrow happens but there is hope

We will have sorrow in this life. Death will happen and this word is an curse word for most people.
We must keep our head up when loved one dies and keep on going in everyday life.

Jacob and the family had the issue of people dying around them. Their lives were no void of pain.
Genesis 35:8 says, "Now Deborah, Rebekah's nurse, died and was buried under the oak outside Bethel. So it was named Allon Bakuth.

We all have relationship with other people. I have noticed that I am closer to non-family members.
Rebekah was close to her nurse, Deborah was most likely an aunt to her.
Deborah died and when someone dies, there will be an funeral. Death brings sadness.
Deborah's grave was under the oak outside of Bethel. Bethel means 'house of God.'


We can embrace God because of Jesus. Jesus is God that was crucified outside of Jerusalem. Leviticus 4:12 says, "That is, all the rest of the bull-he must take outside the camp to a place ceremonially clean, where the ashes are thrown and burned it there in a wood fire on the ash heap."
Jesus was the sacrifice that mankind need to get right with God the Father. He committed no sin but became sin for us so we can be right with Him.  2 Corinthians 5:21 says, "God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteous of God."

Many Christians think that they can become righteous by following the Old Testament law. That is an law. Galatians 3:10 says, "For all who rely on the works of the law are under a curse, as it is written: 'Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the law."

I sin everyday and I am under an curse if I think that I can live under the law. If you think that you can live by the law, then read Romans 7:15-20. I have good news, Jesus fulfilled the law and was the perfect sacrifice for mankind. May we understand John 3:16 and Ephesians 2:8-10.

Christ was put on the cross and treated like someone that committed sin and as unclean according to the law. May we read Numbers 5:1-4 and Numbers 15:32-36.

Some people only remember Jesus as an baby. He grew up as God on earth, living an perfect life and dying on the cross. He conquered death. He was the perfect sacrifice and these Bible verses teaches on this. May we read Exodus 29:21, Leviticus 8:15 and Hebrews 9:22.


We need to understand that Jesus is Emmanuel. God is with us. There an good verses for this statement and it found in John 2:19-21. May we embrace Jesus more everyday.

There was sorrow getting back to Deborah when she died. Allon Bakuth means oak of weeping.
The cross brought tears in people eyes. The disciples lost hope after Jesus died but Jesus conquered death.

We can look forward for a better place because of Jesus and living on this earth. He lived an perfect life and died on the cross and arose from the dead. No good works can save us but only Jesus and repentance.

I am looking for a better place. Let's us claim Hebrews 13:11-13 and Revelation 21:2.

Video link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbxZQZ_jl28

Just traveling

I write some personal thoughts that I had for an month. Life will bring experience and makes people examine life. I believe that life shows that life is very short. We all know that our loved ones will die someday.

My grandmother died a couple weeks ago. I thought of this Bible Verse when she died. James 4:14 says, "What is your life? You are a mist that appears for an little while and then vanishes."
My grandma lived one hundred years. One hundred years is not an long time when we think of forever.

I always thought she would outlive everyone that ever had lived because she beat cancer twice.
There will be a time when a person gives up in life and will die. I will be there someday.

I was concerned that my grandmother would never embrace Jesus. She said to me that she didn't need God for the longest time. That hurt my soul because I thought she would die in her sins.

I prayed for her for over twenty years. My prayers were answered. The last month of her life, she suffered and was humbled. The last week of her life, she got right with Jesus. It is never to late to know Jesus.

I know that my grandma got right with Jesus and I will see her someday. All my grandparents are in heaven with Jesus. We as mankind view death as bad. God see when a person who has repented from their sins and turn to Him, as death a good time. Psalm 116:15 says, "Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints."

Going back home

Do you have fond memories of home? It may the nice meals that an parent baked for you. It could be the nice time growing up with an sibling.

Where is your home? I will be honest, this world is no one home. We may be able to rent an place or have an paper saying that we have some land. No one can keep their land or rented place.

Jacob was living life like me and you. We can easily get distracted from knowing truth in life. We can be addicted to having fun. We may think that money is the cornerstone of life. These things are great but if we miss God then we miss everything.

God told Jacob to go back to Bethel. Bethel means "house of God." Jacob was called to move back to Bethel. Genesis 35:1 says, "Then God said to Jacob, "Go up to Bethel and settle there, and build an altar there to God, who appeared to you when you were fleeing from your brother Esau."

Jacob had issues in his life. Esau wanted to kill Jacob so Jacob ran. God comforted Jacob at Bethel. Jacob built an altar to God. An altar is an place where a person humbles themselves before God.
I need to kneel before the cross of Jesus. I have issues in life, it is called sin. I must be humble before the Lord.

Many times, people say that faith is an belief. It is true but their must be actions showing our trust.
Jacob believed God and he moved to Bethel. Genesis 35:2, "So Jacob said to his household and all who were with him, "Get rid of the foreign gods you have with you, and purify yourself and change your clothes."

Our souls are not right. We have sin in our lives. We must hate our sins and turn to Jesus. Our spiritual clothes are dirty and smells bad. We need an wash from Jesus. When we repent and turn to Jesus then we will have clean clothes.

Genesis 35:3-5, "Then come, let us go up to Bethel, where I will build an altar to the God, who answered me in the day of my distress and who has been with me wherever I have gone." So they gave Jacob all the foreign gods they had and the rings in their ears, and Jacob buried them under the oak at Shechem. Then they set out, and the terror of God fell upon the towns all around them so that so that no one pursed them."

When a person purse Jesus and faith, they will face spiritual attacks from the devil. That person should not fear the devil because God will guide this person.
I am a person of faith. I have been growing in my relationship with Jesus and had spiritual warfare occurred today. I trusted that God would help me and He did.

Jacob and myself needs to be humble before the Lord. May we get closer to Jesus and we hate our sins.

Genesis 35:6-7, "Jacob and all the people with him came to Luz (that is, Bethel) in the land of Canaan. There he built an altar, and he called the place El Bethel, because it was there that God revealed himself to him when he was fleeting from his brother."

 YouTube link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TS_DX-OGey8

We need grace

I have been studying to grow my faith. I have been lead to look at many verses. I will share with what  God has been showing me. I take my faith very serious.

1) The first verse is Ephesians 2:8-9. It says, "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith-and this not from yourself, it is the gift of God-not by works, so that no one can boast."

I see that these verses talk about the cross of Jesus and resurrection with faith will save an person from hell. No amount of God works can save a person or keep an person saved.

2) Here is the second verse. Jesus talked about what works the true believers needs to have. I will now show you this verse.
John 6:28-29, "Then they asked him, "What must we do to do the works God requires?" Jesus answered, "The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent."

It is clear in this verse, that our works to to believe. I am doing the work of God because I believe in Jesus.

3) I am right before the Lord not by doing and observing the Old Testament but the blood of Jesus.
Here is Galatians 2:16, "Know that a man is not justified by observing the law, but by faith in Jesus Christ. So we, too, have put our faith in Christ Jesus and not by observing the law, because by observing the law no one will be justified."

4) Here is an verse about grace that lead up the cross and Jesus is the Word of God.
Galatians 2:21, "I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing."

5) I believe that faith is the key and faith in Jesus. Romans 3:28, "For we maintain that a man is justified by faith apart from observing the law."

6) These Bible verses talked about the curse that may want to follow. Galatians 3:10-14, "All who rely  on observing the law are under a curse, for it is written: "Cursed is everyone who does not continue to do everything written in the Book of the law." Clearly no one is justified before God by the law, because,"The righteous will live by faith." The law is not based on faith; on the contrary, "The man who does these things will live by them." Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming curse for us, for it is written: "Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree." He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit."

Here is some more verses that I have been studying. Study them with me.
They are Matthew 23:1-4, Matthew 23:23-28, Hebrews 11:1-6, Romans 11:6, James 2:10, Hebrews 9-11, Romans 3:1-4:25,  and Colossians 20-23.

Wish life was perfect

Young persons, especially females, are never so safe and well off as under the care of pious parents. Their own ignorance, and the flattery and artifices of designing, wicked people, who are ever laying snares for them, expose them to great danger. They are their own enemies if they desire to go abroad, especially alone, among strangers to true religion. Those parents are very wrong who do not hinder their children from needlessly exposing themselves to danger. Indulged children, like Dinah, often become a grief and shame to their families. Her pretense was, to see the daughters of the land, to see how they dressed, and how they danced, and what was fashionable among them; she went to see, yet that was not all, she went to be seen too. She went to get acquaintance with the Canaanites, and to learn their ways. See what came of Dinah's gadding. The beginning of sin is as the letting forth of water. How great a matter does a little fire kindle! We should carefully avoid all occasions of sin and approaches to it.
The Shechemites submitted to the sacred rite, only to serve a turn, to please their prince, and to enrich themselves, and it was just with God to bring punishment upon them. As nothing secures us better than true religion, so nothing exposes us more than religion only pretended to. But Simeon and Levi were most unrighteous. Those who act wickedly, under the pretext of religion, are the worst enemies of the truth, and harden the hearts of many to destruction. The crimes of others form no excuse for us. Alas! how one sin leads on to another, and, like flames of fire, spread desolation in every direction! Foolish pleasures lead to seduction; seduction produces wrath; wrath thirsts for revenge; the thirst of revenge has recourse to treachery; treachery issues in murder; and murder is followed by other lawless actions. Were we to trace the history of unlawful commerce between the sexes, we should find it, more than any other sin, ending in blood.

Read Genesis 34

Click on this link:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbxZQZ_jl28&t=3s

Do we need an moment of silence?

We always have lived in an world of craziness. Social Media does not make mankind worst but show what is in every person's desires. Who is to blame?

Let's take an moment of silence. We hear that the president is the reason for the world's issues.
There are Podcasts that are self-righteous and the podcasters act holier than thy.
Does the podcasters have blame why the world is messed up?

We need to look at the beginning. God made everything perfect. There was perfection with the first two people that God created. Genesis 1:31 says, "God saw all that He had made and behold, it was very good."  Psalm 18:30 says, "As for God, his way is perfect: The Lord’s word is flawless; he shields all who take refuge in him." We can't blame God for the messed that the world is in.

Can we blame the first two people for the worrisome world that we live in?
Yes, we can blame the issues of today to Adam.

Genesis 3:1-24

Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from any tree in the garden’?”The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’” “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman.  “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves. Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.”And he said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?” The man said, “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.” Then the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?” The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”So the Lord God said to the serpent, “Because you have done this, “Cursed are you above all livestock and all wild animals! You will crawl on your belly and you will eat dust all the days of your life.And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and hers; he will crush your head, and you will strike his heel.” To the woman he said, “I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to children.  Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.”

To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate fruit from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat from it,’ “Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat food from it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you will return.” Adam named his wife Eve, because she would become the mother of all the living. The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them.And the Lord God said, “The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.” So the Lord God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken. After he drove the man out, he placed on the east side of the Garden of Eden cherubim and a flaming sword flashing back and forth to guard the way to the tree of life."

Adam sinned so sin entered this world. We are all to blame. If you were Adam, you would have sinned in the Garden of Eden. Adam's sin caused the imperfect world, you would caused the imperfect world. Christ, who is God, came to this world and redeemed mankind. When Christ was on earth, He was one hundred percent man and one hundred percent God.

Romans 5:12-21

"Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin,and in this way death came to all people, because all sinned— To be sure, sin was in the world before the law was given, but sin is not charged against anyone’s account where there is no law. Nevertheless, death reigned from the time of Adam to the time of Moses, even over those who did not sin by breaking a command, as did Adam, who is a pattern of the one to come. But the gift is not like the trespass. For if the many died by the trespass of the one man, how much more did God’s grace and the gift that came by the grace of the one man, Jesus Christ, overflow to the many! Nor can the gift of God be compared with the result of one man’s sin: The judgment followed one sin and brought condemnation, but the gift followed many trespasses and brought justification. For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God’s abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ! Consequently, just as one trespass resulted in condemnation for all people, so also one righteous act resulted in justification and life for all people. For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous.  The law was brought in so that the trespass might increase. But where sin increased, grace increased all the more, so that, just as sin reigned in death, so also grace might reign through righteousness to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."

The issues of the world comes down to these words.

John 3:16-20

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njFF4UPTZFg